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Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Tanya

Ten on Tuesday

10 Things You Won't Miss About Winter
1. COLD COLD COLD. I LOVE hot weather!
2. SNOW! Wait I don't mind the snow its the icy roads!
3. RAIN RAIN RAIN! We do live in Washington after all!

That's about it!
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Monday, March 30, 2009

Tanya

Week 4


Well we have officially made it through our first month of life! Man are her cheeks getting chubby too! But they are SO cute I just want to pinch them every time! We are still sleeping in 3 hours increments and are now more awake during the day. We seem to have started a small routine as in we are awake for a couple hours first thing in the morning around 8am and then another two hours again around 5pm or 6pm. Other than that it is just off and on throughout the day. But after I am awake that long I sleep VERY soundly (not a lot of grunting). She does still LOVE to grunt though. People have asked how I get any sleep. I have learned her noises. She is a very good baby and only fusses when she is hungry. Still very gassy. She can put daddy and brother to shame passing gas and pooping! Mommy, daddy and brother are all still good. Brother is very excited when he gets to help. Here is a video of them and also of her grunting.

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Friday, March 27, 2009

Tanya

Food Friday

So not being pregnany anymore has not curbed the wanting sweets all the time! DANG!
Oh well you only live once right?
I got this great email from Betty Crocker with a SUPER yummy recipe in it!
Cupcakes
1 box Betty Crocker® SuperMoist® yellow or lemon cake mix
Water, vegetable oil and eggs called for on cake mix box
Filling
3/4 cup Betty Crocker® Whipped vanilla frosting (from 12-oz container)
1/2 cup marshmallow creme
Frosting
1 container (12 oz) Betty Crocker® Whipped butter cream frosting
2 teaspoons grated lemon peel
4 teaspoons fresh lemon juice
1/4 cup Betty Crocker® star decors
Directions:
1. Heat oven to 350°F (325°F for dark or nonstick pans). Make and bake cake mix as directed on box for 24 cupcakes, using water, oil and eggs. Cool in pans 10 minutes; remove from pans to cooling racks. Cool completely, about 30 minutes.
2. By slowly spinning end of round handle of wooden spoon back and forth, make deep, 3/4-inch-wide indentation in center of top of each cupcake, not quite to bottom (wiggle end of spoon in cupcake to make opening large enough).
3. In small bowl, mix filling ingredients. Spoon into small resealable food-storage plastic bag; seal bag. Cut 3/8-inch tip off one bottom corner of bag. Insert tip of bag into opening in each cupcake; squeeze bag to fill opening.
4. In medium bowl, stir together 1 container butter cream frosting, the lemon peel and lemon juice. Frost cupcakes. Sprinkle with stars.
High Altitude (3500-6500 ft): Follow High Altitude directions for cupcakes on cake mix box.
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Thursday, March 26, 2009

Tanya

GREAT toddler games!

My friends at eeBoo toys were nice enough to send me two great toddler games for Little Man to try out.
First off he LOVES games. He would play checkers all day if we let him!

eeBoo is about producing beautiful, useful and well-made products for children.
Using only the original art of well-known and well-loved children's book illustrators we create vibrantly original toys and gifts that hopefully children will affectionately remember.

Spin Me A Rainbow teaches children shapes as well as colors. The rules are so simple and of course Little Man adds his own rules at times!

Fairytale Spinner Game is his favorite. This wonderful game encourages imagination! Once everyone has collected all the "pieces" or elements to a fairytale then they get to share their fairytale with everyone. We play this for hours and hours.

I think our next purchase will be What Time Is It?
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Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Tanya

Belly Bandit! Get back you pre pregnancy shape, or better!

So before I had Little Princess I ran across two products that claimed to help you get your flatter tummy back once you had a baby. I purchased the Belly Bandit.

I have been using it since 2 weeks postpartum and have lost three inches in my waistline and a total of 20 pounds from my last OB appointment before I had baby. I am completely back into pre pregnancy jeans.

Belly Bandit is an abdominal compress similar but not to the extreme of "binding" like they used to do YEARS ago.

You wear it 24 hours a days for 6-8 weeks postpartum. (Consult doctor before using).

It is snug, not too tight or even uncomfortable. I don't even notice it is there most of the time.

The Belly Bandit comes in three styles, The Original Belly Bandit, Couture Belly Bandit, and the most comfortable one the Bamboo Belly Bandit. I purchased the Bamboo Belly Bandit since I wanted to me comfortable 24 hours a day in this thing!

So the only down side I found to this product is cost. The Original Belly Bandit is around $40 plus shipping, Couture Belly Bandit $50 plus shipping, and the Bamboo Belly Bandit $60 plus shipping. Here is the catch I found though. I measured on the low end of a Medium. So I ordered it and within a week and a half I was too small for it. So I contacted the company and asked what they suggested. Order a smalled one of course. Well that was another $60 plus shipping and of course I wanted it right away so I would have to pay an extra $9 for express shipping. So there is no overlap in the sizing guide which would be nice just an inch or two!

It is a great product. Comfortable and actually works!

I still have my Medium (38"-43") sized Bamboo Belly Bandit that I am selling! only worn for two weeks. I will sell it to anyone who is interested for $40 ($20 off original price) plus shipping. Let me know if you are interested. I will be posting it on eBay in about a week.
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Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Tanya

10 on Tuesday

Ten Best Gifts Someone Can Give You
(Pass this onto the husbands!)
1. Brassfields Gift Certificate
2. Amazon Gift Certificate
3. See's Candy (Polar Bear Paws, anything caramel and anything fruit!)
4. Great Wolf Lodge stay!
5. Dinner with me and my hubby at the Ram (we used to go here after Little Man was born and we would eat in a small table in the corner of the bar and talk for hours and hours, once a month!)
6. Right now a good nights sleep? Maybe just 6-8 hours?
7. I'm sure there are more just none that come to mind right now
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Monday, March 23, 2009

Tanya

Week 3

Well at our third week of life Little Princess is doing GREAT! I have always gone to the chiropractor but have never believed in that "magic" that they can make everything better. HOWEVER, on my first trip back to the chiropractor this week, Dr. Jon Pettibon asked how Little Princess was doing and I explained to him her excessive spitting up. He asked if he could take a look and adjust her. Sure no problem with me. He did a tiny adjustment on her back and neck. And she has not spit up since! What a miracle! Especially since I had gone through 6 bibs just that day! Got to run baby girl is hungry!
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Friday, March 20, 2009

Tanya

Food Friday

I love easy snacks and I also love asparagus!
So thanks to my co-worker Peggy who turned me onto this great, simple snack.

Take one slice of salami, spread about a half a teaspoon on cream cheese on it and then wrap that around a spear of pickled asparagus.

VERY yummy, and I can't keep my husband away from it!
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Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Tanya

Snack it up baby!

Getting fiber into my diet is almost impossible now a days.
General Mills has created a new snack bar to help me achieve my daily fiber intake.
New Fiber One Bars provide 35% of the recommended daily fiber intake and it is also a great source for calcium. I don't drink milk so all the extra calcium helps!

Did you know 9 out of 10 Americans aren't getting the recommended amount of fiber.
Are you getting enough fiber? Check out the Fiber-O-Meter! http://www.webmd.com/diet/healthtool-fiber-meter

You can also get a downloadable coupon for $1.35 off at http://bricks.coupons.com/bstart.asp?o=55392&ci=1&c=GM&p=4AbZ6NPX

MyBlogspark has graciously given me three Fiber One Chocolate Mocha Chewy Bars Spa Break gift baskets to giveaway to my readers!
To enter visit http://www.fiberone.com/ and leave a comment and your favorite Fiber One product! Entries will be accepted through March 29, 2009 and I will pick the winner using Random.org. US readers are only eligible. Make sure you leave an email address in your comment or that you have one accessible on your blog so you can be contacted if you win! I will also list the winner on PRIZEYwinners so if you are a subscriber to PRIZEYwinners you do not need to leave your e-mail address. If you do not send me your mailing address within one week of notice of winning I will give your prize to someone else.

To get extra credit
Bloggers - Blog about this contest and link back to me and leave me the link in your comment.
Non Bloggers (or bloggers) - Follow me on Twitter! http://twitter.com/tanyapeila
Please post your extra credit in a separate post.
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Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Tanya

Winner of Making Me: The Pregnancy Activity Book for My Big Brother/Sister Giveaway

Alice H said...
I'm entering for a friend of mine who has 5 kids and is due with her 6th in August. This would be great for her! Thanks for the chance -
Please email me your address within one week.
Check out my other giveaways too!
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Tanya

Winner of Giggle Guide to Baby Gear Giveaway

crystal said...
We're not pregnant with our 2nd yet, but we're working on it! With my first child, my favorite product was (and still is) the video baby monitor. I can see what he's doing at all times.Thanks!
Please email me your address within one week.
Check out my other giveaways!

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Tanya

Wrap me up baby!


I never used a wrap with Little Man but with Little Princess I wanted to use one because they looked SO comfortable. So how do you choose? I have heard great things about so many of them. And I am sure they are all nice or good in their own way!
The nice people from Sleepy Wrap sent me a wrap to review. HOW comfortable! We used it the first time when Little Man's preschool class went to Petco. So I decided what a great time to try it out. She was SO cute in it. I did not have to hold her head or anything. I was completely hands free!
Here are some great reasons why I like the Sleepy Wrap:
-gives great support for little heads and necks -especially when your baby falls asleep
-your baby fits just perfectly every time! -no guessing how much room you will need to leave for you baby to fit inside without being too tight or too loose
-good quality fabric -heavier cotton knit with a touch of spandex-the ideal material for babywearing
-custom fit- simply tie the wrap carrier snug against your body and no matter what body type you are, it will fit!
-no pressure points on your baby -no pressure on developing hips or spines like other hard baby carriers which place pressure on your baby’s pelvis
-holds your baby high -the fabric bounces back unlike the t-shirt like material of other stretchy baby wraps to keep your baby snug against your chest
-adjustable -just enough give so that there is no need for readjusting
-much more snug than carrying a car seat* or other bulky carrier
-secure -no wrinkles, bulges of loose material, or sagging when babywearing
-grows with you and your baby -it's optimal for infants yet you may continue to carry your baby with this wrap baby carrier as long as you are both comfortable
-no baby is too small -the baby wrap is designed for the tiniest of babies
and the list goes on...
Check out Sleepy Wrap today! Go to http://www.sleepywrap.com/ and enter the code TanyaPeila to get 10% off your purchase!
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Tanya

I never knew diaper changing could smell so good!

Yes I mean it.

ELSIE'S ORIGINAL is about getting back to the basics...pure & simple. Which means no harsh chemicals, no funky, hard to understand ingredients and no gimmicks.

Their Baby Bum Wipes smell SO good, like lavender! I love using them on Little Princess. And the soothing organic Tea Tree essential oil had helped with her "napkin dermatitis."

ELSIE'S ORIGINAL was developed by a new mom who found herself facing a dilemma, "What to use on dropped items that go back into my baby's mouth when good old fashioned soap and water are not around?" When she learned that anti bacterial wipes contained alcohol and chloride, she searched high and low for an alternative. Finding nothing, she created ELSIE'S ORIGINAL.

Little Man likes using the all natural Germ Fighting Wipes when it is time for him to love on sister! These are super easy for him to use and we don't have to worry about the alcohol content!

I have a bottle of Baby Bum Spray that ELSIE'S ORIGINAL sent to me. The same great solution found in their Baby Bum Wipes for those who prefer to use cloth wipes and not disposables. Just spray then wipe to give a way!

To enter leave a comment! Entries will be accepted through March 29, 2009 and I will pick the winner using Random.org. US readers are only eligible. Make sure you leave an email address in your comment or that you have one accessible on your blog so you can be contacted if you win! I will also list the winner on PRIZEYwinners so if you are a subscriber to PRIZEYwinners you do not need to leave your e-mail address. If you do not send me your mailing address within one week of notice of winning I will give your prize to someone else.
To get extra credit
Bloggers - Blog about this contest and link back to me and leave me the link in your comment.
Non Bloggers (or bloggers) - Follow me on Twitter! http://twitter.com/tanyapeila
Please post your extra credit in a separate post.
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Monday, March 16, 2009

Tanya

Week 2

We made it through two weeks of life! Little Princess still sleeps a lot and is only up for 10-15 minutes at a time. On the rare occasion around 9:30PM she is up for almost 45 minutes.

We have ALMOST got the eating down. She only really spits up once a day. We have a two week well child today so we will see how much she weighs now!
The jaundice looks SO much better. Only the whites of her eyes still look a little yellow. But the doctor said that is the last to go away.
She had found her fingers and HATES to have her arms in blankets. That runs in the family!
She gets up every couple of hours to eat at night. Every once in a while she will sleep for 3-4 hours too!
I am taking it as easy as I can. Running around after Big Brother who is still having a hard time adjusting at times. And I can't stand to be cooped up in the house. We have been walking in the evening while Little Man rides his bike. It is nice to get some fresh air and let Little Man blow off some steam!
Little Princess makes the funniest noises constantly. All through the night even. But we are learning the differences between, I'm hungry, I'm pooping or I have gas!
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Friday, March 13, 2009

Tanya

Are you a leaky mom? I am!

So with Little Man there was not a whole lot of breastfeeding, however I did notice that when I fed him or pumped from one side the other side would leak. Hhmmm, what a waste! That hard earned milk just being soaked up by a nursing pad. I asked other moms what they did. I got answers from "I stuff a diaper down there" to "I put a burp cloth in my bra."

I have found the coolest gadget that saves your milk, easily! It's called Milkies Milk-Saver! It fits perfectly into your bra while you breastfeed or you can also attach the bag of your choice to collect your milk in.

The case also is used as a stand so you have somewhere to put it when you are getting finished up!

It amazes me how much I collect from my "non-nursing" side. I'm glad I found this product so I don't loose that valuable milk!
So are you a leaky mama? And if you are are you saving that precious milk? Or soaking it up with a diaper?
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Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Tanya

Winner of Listplanit.com subscription

Rock Star Ma said...
The decision planner sounds like something i could really utilize!
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Tanya

Windy days and Blankyclips

So one of the great products I found while I was pregnant that has come in real handy this past "windy" week are Blankyclips!!!! These great, super cute clips come in handy when the sun is bright or the wind is blowing.


Invented by a mom, with blankyclip, blankets falling off strollers and car seats are a thing of the past.

The clips are so soft and padded your infant and/or toddler can play with them as well.
They can be used virtually anywhere, car seats, strollers, bouncy seats or other carriers.

Blankyclips come in 3 styles, bears, ducks, and sheep. Each set contain two clips and an oh so soft plush blanket.

If you visit http://www.blankyclip.com/ you can receive 10% off your order by using the code: mommy10
Stop by today and let me know what you think!
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Monday, March 9, 2009

Tanya

No more tears

When Little Man was growing up I learned about the Johnson & Johnson No More Tears line. I still use it. Makes him smell like a baby still. I know one day he will want to use big boy soap but until then! I can't wait to start using it with Little Princess.

This year is the 50th Anniversary for JOHNSON’S® NO MORE TEARS®.
My friends from MOM Central sent me some samples of the JOHNSON’S® HEAD-TO-TOE® Foaming Wash and JOHNSON’S® Baby Bubble Bath & Wash. LOVE THEM!!!
The foaming wash is wonderful because you don't have to use a lot to get the job done.
JOHNSON'S® introduces a new HEAD-TO-TOE® Foaming Wash in an easy, convenient pump-and-foam form. The specially designed bottle allows moms and caregivers the flexibility of using only one hand to dispense the product while also providing substantial lather for cleansing babies. This new, gentle cleansing product contains mild ingredients and the updated JOHNSON'S® NO MORE TEARS® formula that utilizes new science and technology from JOHNSON'S®. Cleansing with JOHNSON'S® HEAD-TO-TOE® Foaming Wash is proven to be as mild as cleansing with water alone. Over time, baby soaps can cause dry skin or irritation.

JOHNSON'S® HEAD-TO-TOE® Foaming Wash is designed to help avoid these common skin problems before they start by gently gliding across the skin’s surface, effectively cleansing without causing irritation. Grounded in extensive scientific research, JOHNSON'S® HEAD-TO-TOE Foaming Wash is soap-free, dye-free, hypoallergenic and dermatologist tested, and is specially designed for newborns. JOHNSON'S® HEAD-TO-TOE® Foaming Wash is a mild and well-tolerated skin cleanser.

And who does not like Bubble Bath?
For years, JOHNSON'S® Baby products have been formulated to properly care for babies’ delicate skin. Now JOHNSON'S® is introducing Baby Bubble Bath & Wash for a fun and safe bath time experience. JOHNSON'S® Baby Bubble Bath & Wash contains an all-new formula combining the NO MORE TEARS® extra gentle baby wash formula with big, bath time bubbles. The new, dermatologist- and pediatrician-tested formula is gentle enough to use everyday and is clinically proven mild for both baby girls and boys.
Grounded in extensive scientific research, the NO MORE TEARS® formula found in JOHNSON'S® Baby Bubble Bath & Wash is ultra mild, resulting in a gentle cleansing product specially designed for baby’s unique skin, hair and eye needs. JOHNSON'S® Baby Bubble Bath & Wash is soap-free, dye-free, hypoallergenic, dermatologist and pediatrician tested, and is gentle enough for the newest babies.

Check out the Johnson & Johnson channel on YouTube http://www.youtube.com/baby.

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Tanya

Week 1

Yes we are starting over! But this time it is with Little Princesses new venture in the world!

So we had a rough start to life. Little Princess had low blood sugar at birth so she had heel pricks every three hours for almost 28 hours after birth. After that we high high jaundice levels. We are still waiting on results of her last blood test for this.


At first she would only sleep in bed with me but she slept for 3-4 hours at a time! YEAH! Well not, because co-sleeping was not in our plan. So we tried the bassinet instead of the cradle. So far she is sleeping 2-3 hours in it but at least she is sleeping in her own bed.


She is great at spitting up too!! She burps great but still seems to spit up quite a bit.


So we are doing good so far. I did get the "you did too much today" talk from the nurse once so I am trying to take it easy.

Good thing too is big brother wants to keep her still! He even offered to let her stay at grandma's with him this past weekend!
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Friday, March 6, 2009

Tanya

Some final suggestions for Preparing Your Child for a New Baby

Over the past week was have gone though some great suggestions and products to help prepare your child for the arrival of your new baby. Here are some other great items that can help as well!
There's a Brand-New Baby at Our House and I'm the Big Brother is a wonderful book for your little girl (Big Sister version also) or little boy. This book is filled with interactive book that is great for the younger "big" sibling. The Big Brother/Sister gets to tell their story about the new arrival. Including they their favorite toys, bedtime, growing up, favorite, books, and bible stories. This is an excellent gift for the Big Brother or Sister to be. We will be giving our copy to Little Man at the hospital.

Another great gift that you can buy or even make if you are crafty is this great Crayon Keeper. You can find them all over the Internet. This with some paper or coloring book will help keep your Big Brother or Sister occupied at the hospital or even at home. You can have it personalized with their name to make them feel extra special.
There are many great products to buy or make out there to help your Big Brother or sister feel extra special on the day their new little baby arrives. The biggest thing we have learned with Little Man is to tell him all about what is happening. Where we will go and where he will go. He has lots of questions that we try to answer, in a not too "technical" way.
Good luck with your ventures in parenting and motherhood and with your new arrival!
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Thursday, March 5, 2009

Tanya

Giggle Guide to Baby Gear Giveaway

One of the things Little Man has found the greatest pleasure in is helping shop for his new little sister. He finds all sorts of outfits and says "This is SO cute!"

He also loves to pick out binkies and also had a hand in helping pick out the stroller and car seat set and much much more!

We had a helping hand in choosing all the items for Little Princess. Things have changed so much since Little Man!!!

Giggle.com have donated a copy of their giggle guide to baby gear book for me to give away to one of my readers.

Whether you're having trouble choosing the perfect stroller, car seat, crib, or even a diaper bag, the giggle guide to baby gear is here to help! A winner of the iParenting Media Award's "Greatest Products of 2008" and written by our very own founder and CEO, Ali Wing, this shopping companion teaches you how to pick the right products for you and your baby based on your family's lifestyle. It includes shopping checklists for every stage, and helps you understand your basic choices and what features to look for on purchases both big and small. Happy shopping!

To enter comment on your favorite baby product and your due date. Entries will be accepted through March 15, 2009 and I will pick the winner using Random.org. US readers are only eligible. Make sure you leave an email address in your comment or that you have one accessible on your blog so you can be contacted if you win! I will also list the winner on PRIZEYwinners so if you are a subscriber to PRIZEYwinners you do not need to leave your e-mail address. If you do not send me your mailing address within one week of notice of winning I will give your prize to someone else.
To get extra credit
Bloggers - Blog about this contest and link back to me and leave me the link in your comment.
Non Bloggers (or bloggers) - subscribe to my mailing list/RSS feed and earn another entry! Must be a NEW subscription, current subscribers may not use this as extra credit.
Please post your extra credit in a separate post.
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Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Tanya

Big Brother a Prince Mission

In the last couple months I was told by one of my readers that she was a member of a file folder community. What in the world was a file folder community I asked. Well you would never guess what these wonderful women put together with file folders and use as an educational tool! Lapbooklessons.com required a membership but it is FREE! You can find directions and free printables for all sorts of "lapbooks" which are simply books made with file folders. Little Man has successfully completed on about Transportation and brings it out daily! Recently released were lapbooks for Big Brother, a Prince Mission and Big Sister, a Princess Mission. Little Man has already started his Big Brother, a Prince Mission lap book. This is a great resource to get your older child involved and educated about the new little one to come.

Check out lapbookslessons.com today for some great activities for your children of all ages!
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Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Tanya

Little Princess has arrived!


Here are the details:

Ashlee Faith Michelle Peila

Born March 1, 2009 (36 weeks, 3 days gestation)

6:01a.m.

6 lbs. 15 oz.

19 inches long

Long story short, went in Saturday with regular contractions but not too hard. Since I had Little Man in hours they wanted me to come in and get checked. I was still dilated to a 4 (had been since Monday). They did a biophysical profile and found her amniotic fluid level was slightly low and she was not moving around as much as they wanted her to. So at first they were going to send me home then they were going to give me some pills to thin my cervix. Then they decided to induce with Potossin (spelling). Started Potossin at 8pm on Saturday. By 2:30 a.m. contractions were good o I took the epidural. However there was no progress, still at a 4. So they decided to brake my water at 4:15. By 5a.m. I was at a 6. I called family to come up. 5:30, 8cm. 5:59 a.m. time to push. One long push later there she was! She had low blood sugar so unfortunately they took heel blood every three hours until 8 a.m. the next morning so she does not like her feet being touched now. She finally passed the blood sugar test though and got a bath and we left yesterday around 5pm. Big brother thinks she is pretty cool!
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Tanya

Making Me: The Pregnancy Activity Book for My Big Brother/Sister Giveaway

One of the great ways I foudn to prepare the older child for your new arrival is books! There are tons of books all about being a Big Brother or Sister! I found this great book Making Me: The Pregnancy Activity Book for My Big Brother/Sister by Julie Carr. Julie was nice enough to send me a copy of her book to giveaway to one of my readers.

Making Me: The Pregnancy Activity Book for My Big Brother/Sister is great for children who are 5 years-10 years old. And it is best to get it when you first find out you are expecting beucase the acitivtes take the big brother/sister through the entire pregnanacy.

Here is some more information about the book.

CONGRATULATIONS! You're going to be a big brother or sister!
I want to teach you about me, the baby-to-be, and make this pregnancy as fun as possible for you. Every day, from the time I'm just a single cell to the day I'm born, I will let you know what's happening with me. I'll also have something fun for you to do each day, whether it's coloring, counting, measuring, jumping, journaling, or something else. Wow! Learning *and* having fun. What a concept.

You'll be able to see how big I am with the Mighty Measuring Tape and can track the days to my due date with the cool Countdown Car on every page.

Bonus features!
- Includes 4 colored pencils to help you write, color, and draw.
- Includes the 24" Mighty Measuring Tape to track my growth.
- Hard cover, 286 pages.
----------------
Hear what the big-shots have to say about this book:
"Making Me is a creative one-of-a-kind daily calendar that teaches siblings about fetal development in a fun and interactive way." - Jodie Oltmans, MD, Pediatrician
-------------------
"As a child psychologist, I highly recommend this book to parents who wish to nurture a healthy sibling relationship as early as possible by involving their child in the new baby's development... This book is packed full of engaging, age-appropriate, multi-sensory activities that are perfect for children of all ages."- Robin Malinosky-Rummell, Ph.D., child clinical psychologist, school psychologist, and author of " Bring Your Own Children: South America! A Family Sabbatical Handbook"
--------------------
"Just as Countdown to My Birth is a charming way to help expecting mothers form an emotional bond with their unborn child, Making Me is an ingenious way to help older siblings form an emotional bond with their unborn brother or sister.- Bruce Lansky, author of 100,000+ Baby Names

To enter to win a copy of this book comment on your due date and how many children you currently have. Entries will be accepted through March 15, 2009 and I will pick the winner using Random.org. US readers are only eligible. Make sure you leave an email address in your comment or that you have one accessible on your blog so you can be contacted if you win! I will also list the winner on PRIZEYwinners so if you are a subscriber to PRIZEYwinners you do not need to leave your e-mail address. If you do not send me your mailing address within one week of notice of winning I will give your prize to someone else.
To get extra credit
Bloggers - Blog about this contest and link back to me and leave me the link in your comment.
Non Bloggers (or bloggers) - subscribe to my mailing list/RSS feed and earn another entry! Must be a NEW subscription, current subscribers may not use this as extra credit.
Please post your extra credit in a separate post.
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Monday, March 2, 2009

Tanya

Preparing Your Older Child for the New Baby

SO most of you know my now we are anxiously awaiting baby #2, aka Little Princess. I have been searching all over the web for resources for preparing Little Man for her arrival.
I found this wonderful article on Natural Mom Talk Radio written by Carrie Huggins that got me started!

Preparing Your Older Child for the New Baby
September 14, 2008


I remember hearing horror stories about older kids and their jealousy towards the new baby in the house. One friend of mine even said her daughter tried to suffocate her baby with a pillow!
can’t imagine how that must have felt. It was also totally foreign to me because I didn’t have any trouble at all with my toddlers trying to hurt their new sibling. I never even saw any signs of rivalry or upset at all.

I think it’s because of some of the things I did during the pregnancy and in the first few hours, days and weeks after I gave birth.

Here are some of those things. I hope they help you if you’re about to go through this!

Sell them on “big brother” or “big sister”.

Speak in positive terms to them about what it means to be a big sis or big brother. Really play up the importance of their role and help them to feel special and needed. You will want to discuss how they can be your helper and how much you need them because after the birth you will be sore and tired.

You may want to assign them a specific task, something age appropriate. For a younger child, fetching diapers for you might be a good one. With my babies, I invited the older toddler to come and join us during diaper changes to involve them. We would chat and I would let them help any way they could, and it was a pleasant time. Help your child to appreciate how much you need their help.

Don’t plan any other major changes.

This would not be a good time to introduce any other major changes into their life, such as potty training, different sleeping arrangements or any other similar changes. You don’t want to overwhelm them nor add any added stress to their lives or yours.

If your toddler is still nursing, there is no reason to stop during your pregnancy or even afterwards when the new baby arrives. Many moms have found that tandem nursing (breastfeeding siblings who are not twins) is very rewarding and a wonderful way to ease the transition for the older child.

When they are assured of your place in their lap, they are not as likely to be jealous or resent the new baby. I found this to be absolutely true with mine. My toddlers were all still nursing when their siblings were born, and it was wonderful to help them adjust. I shared my story in the link above.

Talk to them.

Children understand more than we think. So, spend some time talking with them about the big event. You can tell them about what will happen when you go to have the baby, where they will be staying, and what they can expect. If you are having the baby at home or in a birthing center, you might want to consider allowing them to be with you at the birth. Children who are close by the mother during her labor are more likely to view the new baby as “ours” instead of an alien intruder! Some parents have found it helpful to read books that talk about getting a new baby in the house. These often explain how new babies need constant care and feeding.
It’s also helpful to share the story of their own birth with your toddler. Young children seem to love to hear the story of their birth! Talk about how it was such a happy day for you because you finally got to meet them. Tell them details, and let them watch birth videos if you have them, and allow them to go through their baby books and pictures.

Involve them in the pregnancy.

Take your older child to prenatal appointments if you can. This helps them to start bonding with the unborn child. This is a lot easier if you’re getting care from a midwife, who will welcome your other children and allow them to listen to the heartbeat or play with the stethoscope and other equipment! My kids always had fun when we visited the midwife for our appointments.
My oldest son even cut his two baby sister’s cords when they were born. I have pictures of him all decked out as Obi-Wan Kenobi, complete with light sabre, when his first sister was born. He was so protective of her and called her Padme for the first few months of her life.

Get help.

Going from one to two (or two to three, and on and on!) is a wonderful time to ask friends, family, Grandparents and others for a little help. While you and the baby are resting, could someone play with your toddler, arrange a playdate or take them to the park for a couple of hours?

A little extra one on one time with a beloved adult can make up for the fact that you are going to be giving the toddler a little less attention for awhile. This is a time for Dad to step up too. While he does need time to bond with the newborn, this can be a time of growth in the older child as he embraces Dad as someone who can also meet his needs.

Watch your language.

When the baby arrives, be careful how you phrase things. If your older child asks you for something and you can’t help them because you’re caring for the baby, don’t “blame” it on the baby. Say something like, “My hands are busy now, but I can play with you in a few minutes. Why don’t you come snuggle next to me and I’ll read you a story?”

Another tip that some moms have found helpful is to talk up the older child to the baby. We moms love to go ga-ga and talk goo goo over our babies, but why not brag on the older sibling? “Ooh look at what big brother is doing! He’s building a block tower and it’s sooooo tall!” This can make the older child’s heart swell with pride. I heard this tip from a mom I admired, and when I did it, I could see the older child’s face practically beaming. Of course, the baby can’t understand a word you’re saying, but that doesn’t matter!

If your child does express some negative feelings towards the new baby, do not deflect it or try to change their feelings. It won’t work! It’s insulting and we know how WE feel when someone does that to us. Instead, mirror them by saying something empathic, like “It’s tough having to share mommy with the new baby sometimes.” You don’t have to agree with them, just empathize. When we do that, they feel safe sharing their feelings, and are able to process and work through them better. But if we can all bent out of shape they feel misunderstood and frustrated, which doesn’t help matters.

There’s one thing that some people who come to visit your new family may do that you need to watch for. This always made me cringe every time I observed it! They overreact every time the older children touch the baby.
Another thing to be careful of when it comes to visitors is this: Don’t let them focus 100% of their attention on the new baby. People do this too, and they don’t mean any harm. But imagine how it feels to the older child when everyone around him is completely besotted with “baby this and baby that”. They don’t even ask him questions except to say, “So how do you like the new baby?” LOL!

If your guests or family members do this, tactfully steer the conversation around.

Clueless Aunt: “So, little Johnny, how do you like the new baby so far?”

Little Johnny: “Um, he’s ok. I guess.”

You:Auntie, did you see the picture Johnny painted? It’s over there on the refrigerator. Johnny, would you like to show Auntie your new picture? Maybe she can get your paints out and you can draw a new one for her to take home to Aunt Joe.”

You might want to even ask family members and friends to bring a small gift for your older child when they come visit the baby. If they’re not cool like that, stash some presents or treats of your own, and whip them out when baby has a gift to unwrap.

Babies just aren’t that fragile!

It’s more important that your older child bond with the baby, and much of that takes place through touch. Train and teach your older kids how to hold and touch the baby. With a toddler, you may have to guide his hands or tell him to touch “Soft, like a butterfly.”

Don’t freak out whenever the older kids come around the baby, or they’ll come to resent him. You don’t want them to feel like useless, clumsy clods around the “precious” baby. It’s very hurtful to them. There were so many times that my older kids jostled the new baby like s/he was a sack of potatoes, and the baby never even woke up most of the time, much less minded.
Babies like stimulation and they find their big sibs extremely exciting! I noticed that my babies would turn their heads and follow a sibling around the room with their eyes. I made a point of saying this out loud to my older kids. I also reminded them that the baby KNEW them already because of hearing them for so many months in the womb.

They were really impressed by that.

Another thing alone these lines is, allow your toddler or older child to see and spend time with you as soon as possible after the birth. Don’t let other family members, including your husband if he’s overzealous, prevent them from reconnecting with you. Especially if you’ve been away at a hospital birth is this true. Don’t make a big deal over the new baby. Let them hug and kiss YOU and then notice the baby (who ideally should not be in your arms for this little reunion).

Don’t feel guilty.

It’s very common for moms to feel guilty about displacing their older child. I know I certainly felt this way when I was pregnant with my second child. I grieved for what I felt was a loss, and I was worried about my older son - as if he was losing something instead of gaining!
Remember that children have been dealing with the arrival of siblings since the beginning of time! They will be just fine, and will gain a playmate and perhaps a lifelong friend. Be positive about the transition and your child will likely pick up on your emotions.

Practice babywearing.

A baby sling or carrier can be invaluable for several reasons. For one, you can have your hands free in a sling, meaning you can play with a toddler almost like baby’s not there, where s/he naps peacefully. You’ll always have a free arm to pour a glass of milk, get a snack, offer a hug, a boost onto the swings, or to hold a book to read a story. Kids don’t mind so much the arrival of a new sibling as they mind the demand on your time. If you can still do most of the stuff you did before, it’s all good.

Be prepared for your own emotions.

Nature has set things up so that your priority is to your newborn infant, and that’s as it should be. A lot of times we are surprised by the ferocity of our own feelings of loyalty to our new babies. It’s not that we don’t love our toddlers, because we do.

But during the early weeks, don’t be surprised at your feelings. You might see your toddler differently and are a little afraid that you’ve fallen out of love with him!

Don’t worry! These feelings will subside, and you’ll soon be seeing your toddler through normal eyes. A little extra sleep helps too!

Thanks Carrie for permission to post your article and thanks for a great starting point in preparing Little Man for our new arrival!
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